Fear is so embedded in the minds hearts and spirits of the generations that precede us that it is often difficult to break tradition and live a brave and courageous life. It is only through sheer self will and perseverance that we can break that cycle and move forward with a renewed strength and desire to uncover truth and liberate the oppressed.
Only mere decades have passed since the abolition of slavery. An entire race of people were actually persecuted because of the color of their skin. It has always been an injustice for which this country should still feel shame.
And here we are in 2012, and we, homosexual men and women, are still being persecuted because of who we love.
We cannot change, nor do we choose to be different. We are born this way. Just as African Americans could not change the color of their skin, we cannot change who we were born to love. It is the root of our very nature. We are merely the "blacks" of the new millennium.
And here we are still being persecuted, judged, and often punished. It makes absolutely no sense to me.
But fear runs deeply. I mentioned to someone close to me that I was writing this blog and he immediately asked if I was afraid of what people would think. And this person completely loves and supports me. So it just proves my point further that we all have to make a conscious decision to be fearless.
And just so you know, my response
was, "My very existence as a gay man, living my life openly and loudly, here in the South is often considered offensive, to which I could care less; so do you think I would ever care what people may think about what I have to say?"
I only express these thoughts to try to open minds and help others liberate themselves from the shame and guilt that they carry. And I carry the same shame and guilt, but it is not mine. Just as your burden of shame is not yours. It belongs to society. And it had been heaped upon us to carry because we are not like everyone else. It has been tattooed on our spirits ever since we realized we were different.
I actually remember what it was like when I first realized I was gay. I didn't know what it was I was feeling or that I was different from other boys. I only knew it felt right and safe and true. And it was innocent and pure and unscarred.
It's not until I was bullied and harrassed and heckled for being "me" that I began to wear that cloak of shame and guilt. It is no different than taking a rose that is about to bloom out of the sun. It will slowly wither and die unless it finds the sun once again.
And that sun for me has been my loving and supportive mother who has stood behind me no matter what. And it is she who also helped me regain special memories of my childhood that were a testament to my homosexual nature even as early as four and five years old. It is those very memories that show me how innocent and pure love really is and how much is lost, as we grow, when we are stifled by things like societal pressure, or religion, or legislature, or worst of all, hate.
Well said.
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