I decided to begin a daily blog documenting the truth and the falacies of what it is like to live as a gay man in modern day South Carolina. Many people believe things have changed drastically over the years as we strive to become a more accepting and compassionate society, but quite the opposite is still true.
I have lived most of my adult life in New York City where I never took for granted the most basic and primal freedoms that we all as human beings should all be afforded...the need to love and express oneself as truly as one desires. Whether gay or not, most people are unable to fully appreciate the amount of freedom that comes with city life. I have always said to anyone who lives in a small town or part of the country that is repressed by fear and ignorance; the things for which you have been persecuted will be the same things that will make you shine when you move to a big city.
Most heterosexuals just do not quite seem to grasp how lucky they are that they are able to love without boundaries, judgement, and persecution. How lucky they are to be able to hold a lover's hand, steal a kiss, or lovingly touch their partner in public without the fear of possible reprocussion.
After living in what I consider the "real world", New York City, it has been extremely difficult moving back to South Carolina. Even though I am out and proud and live true to my nature wherever I reside, the inability to live as openly and freely as I chose makes me feel as if I have been closeted once again.
I understand that this is "the South" or the "biblebelt" or "that change takes time here", but those excuses just don't cut it. And what makes it worse is that it isn't just the typical conservative closeminded christian who is halting the gay movement in the South, but it is many of the gay men who live here.
I apologize to the gay men who live here in South Carolina or other southern states who stand up for their rights and are unafraid to live and love freely. I do not mean to stereotype or generalize, but I have most definitely found that the majority of gay men here in South Carolina who should be setting an example for our gay youth have turned a cheek and settled to be placed in a box labeled "less than", "unwanted", or "apathetic", and put on a shelf somewhere in the back.
My daily accounts may surprise or at times offend, but I feel it is my duty to detail the truth that noone is willing to share or discuss. I am not one to accept things as they are, or to succumb to societal pressure and judgement, so be prepared as you follow my blog that what you read is from my personal perspective and experience.
And just a personal note to the reader: My physical looks and how I carry myself most definitely affect how I am perceived by the general public. For the small town middle American who has a preconcieved notion of who a gay man is from watching movies or television, I break most of the stereotypes. I am strong, confident, talented, and extremely proud, and I apologize if I sound arrogant, as I believe humility is key; but I often turn the heads of both men and women alike when I enter a room.
And I give that information so that the experiences I detail will make sense and be more understandable, as one's appearance most definitely affects another's perception of who he is.
The goal of this blog is to detail truths that are often overlooked, feared, and ignored so that things will start to change more dramatically here in the South, and so we can all have the same freedoms and respect that we deserve.
I only ask that as you follow my blog you keep an open mind. I am not here to bash the South. As I have said, I am only here to state some facts that noone is willing to say aloud.
And quite frankly if you take any offense to what I write, then I believe you must still be living under a blanket of fear and ignorance, and need to ask yourself, "Am I part of the problem or the solution?"
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